Bahai Forums

Go Back   Baha'i Forums > Baha'i Forums > Baha'i Administration

Baha'i Administration Baha'i administrative order


Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 08-15-2014, 03:02 PM   #1
Senior Member
 
Joined: Jul 2011
From: n ireland
Posts: 1,747
Nepotism

Locally I think this is a problem. At summer school i noticed that all the organisers etc come from middle class professional backgrounds often knowing each other socially. On the local council, some second generation Baha'is are succeeding their parents. I see a wealth of talent among less affluent people seemingly being ignored. What a pity!
 
Join Baha'i Forums


Welcome to Baha'i Forums, an open Baha'i Faith community! We welcome everyone and the community is free to join so register today and become part of the Baha'i Forums family!


Old 08-15-2014, 04:08 PM   #2
Senior Member
 
Joined: May 2013
From: forest falls california
Posts: 1,730
Speak up

Quote:
Originally Posted by aidan View Post
Locally I think this is a problem. At summer school i noticed that all the organisers etc come from middle class professional backgrounds often knowing each other socially. On the local council, some second generation Baha'is are succeeding their parents. I see a wealth of talent among less affluent people seemingly being ignored. What a pity!
Aiden,
. You need to speak up on this at Cluster Gatherings and your District Convention, and not just here on Baha'i Forums. A lot of people make these kinds of observations, but don't voice them. Probably pray about it some and consult with whoever you are comfortable with, but take it to a higher level.

.
 
Old 08-15-2014, 05:09 PM   #3
Senior Member
 
Joined: Jul 2011
From: n ireland
Posts: 1,747
I fear being accused of jealousy which truly is not the case
 
Old 08-15-2014, 09:37 PM   #4
Senior Member
 
Joined: May 2013
From: forest falls california
Posts: 1,730
Phrase

Quote:
Originally Posted by aidan View Post
I fear being accused of jealousy which truly is not the case
. Let the accusers accuse, if they must. I think it is how you phrase it, and the spirit behind your motivations to give voice to your thoughts. Others will identify with that spirit if it is pure.

. Ya Baha'ul'Abha!!
 
Old 08-15-2014, 09:47 PM   #5
Senior Member
 
Joined: May 2013
From: forest falls california
Posts: 1,730
Hidden Words

Quote:
Originally Posted by aidan View Post
I fear being accused of jealousy which truly is not the case
Aiden,
. This is one of those things that you have to hold inside for awhile and meditate on it until it is ripe. Then the right words at the right time will happen, and won't feel so uncomfortable, I think. What comes to mind is this Hidden Word:

. O SON OF DUST!

. The wise are they that speak not unless they obtain a hearing, even as the cup-bearer, who proffereth not his cup till he findeth a seeker, and the lover who crieth not out from the depths of his heart until he gazeth upon the beauty of his beloved. Wherefore sow the seeds of wisdom and knowledge in the pure soil of the heart, and keep them hidden, till the hyacinths of divine wisdom spring from the heart and not from mire and clay.
 
Old 08-15-2014, 10:15 PM   #6
Senior Member
 
Joined: Jul 2011
From: n ireland
Posts: 1,747
Dale thank you very much for your useful advice
 
Old 08-16-2014, 07:17 AM   #7
Senior Member
 
BlinkeyBill's Avatar
 
Joined: Oct 2011
From: Quilimari,Chile
Posts: 4,200
Quote:
Originally Posted by aidan View Post
Locally I think this is a problem. At summer school i noticed that all the organisers etc come from middle class professional backgrounds often knowing each other socially. On the local council, some second generation Baha'is are succeeding their parents. I see a wealth of talent among less affluent people seemingly being ignored. What a pity!
Yes dear friend, we have a long way to go, in learning the functioning of Baha'i institutions and letting go of the ways of the old world order.

Paul Lample (former member of the UHJ.) has written a good book dealing with these issues.

We all see these things but tend to be silent when the Local Spiritual Assembly is the place to raise such concerns, as Dale has said in a wise and loving manner.
 
Old 08-16-2014, 07:42 AM   #8
Senior Member
 
Joined: Mar 2013
From: Netherlands
Posts: 276
It sounds like there are people in your community with talents which aren't being used. You don't have to be elected or appointed to do this. This is really what the Training Institute is for; developing capacity for service. Those talents are so needed in the Faith. These talented souls could become children's class teachers, or junior youth animators, or hold regular devotional meetings in their homes, or firesides, or study circles. And the more they do, the more they will naturally be seen as having talents and capacites, and the more likely it is that they will be asked to serve in other ways.

All best wishes,

Suzanne
 
Old 08-16-2014, 07:49 AM   #9
Senior Member
 
BlinkeyBill's Avatar
 
Joined: Oct 2011
From: Quilimari,Chile
Posts: 4,200
Quote:
Originally Posted by Suzanne9 View Post
It sounds like there are people in your community with talents which aren't being used. You don't have to be elected or appointed to do this. This is really what the Training Institute is for; developing capacity for service. Those talents are so needed in the Faith. These talented souls could become children's class teachers, or junior youth animators, or hold regular devotional meetings in their homes, or firesides, or study circles. And the more they do, the more they will naturally be seen as having talents and capacites, and the more likely it is that they will be asked to serve in other ways.

All best wishes,

Suzanne
An excellent point dear Suzanne
 
Old 08-16-2014, 09:33 AM   #10
Senior Member
 
Joined: Jul 2014
From: US
Posts: 233
Such is the sort of malaise that any organized body seems to fall into. General human clique-y-ness. I think that other posters have given great advice, speak up, or even better - do something about it yourself. Lead by example, not by decree of authority.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 12:36 AM   #11
Senior Member
 
Joined: Jul 2011
From: n ireland
Posts: 1,747
Human relationships are very delicate things. I'd be loathe to cause any disquiet. I think the best way forward for me is to constant assert my willingness and availability to serve. I think hosting fire sides and study circles is where my strengths may lie.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 04:00 AM   #12
Senior Member
 
Joined: Mar 2013
From: Netherlands
Posts: 276
I much prefer study circles, devotional meetings, children's classes, etc., where the emphasis is spiritual and social to serving on assemblies where the emphasis is administrative.

Also, I've noticed that the less affluent tend to have a more receptive population for teaching; but this is often coupled with offering to do classes for spiritual empowerment of their children. When they see the effect they have on their kids, they become interested.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 05:47 AM   #13
Senior Member
 
Joined: Oct 2013
From: United States
Posts: 1,142
I think the best thing for people to do is discover their own avenues for service.

There are an infinite number of things one can do for Baha'u'llah other than organize summer school classes. Many people don't have the money, ability to travel and vacation time to participate in Baha'i summer schools anyway. I know there are "scholarships" and the like available, but many people strongly dislike the feeling of asking for charity.

I agree with your idea to focus on other areas like hosting firesides and study circles.

Last edited by Matthew Light; 08-17-2014 at 05:49 AM.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 08:15 AM   #14
Senior Member
 
BlinkeyBill's Avatar
 
Joined: Oct 2011
From: Quilimari,Chile
Posts: 4,200
Quote:
Originally Posted by Suzanne9 View Post
I much prefer study circles, devotional meetings, children's classes, etc., where the emphasis is spiritual and social to serving on assemblies where the emphasis is administrative.

Also, I've noticed that the less affluent tend to have a more receptive population for teaching; but this is often coupled with offering to do classes for spiritual empowerment of their children. When they see the effect they have on their kids, they become interested.
Dear Suzanne I also have seen the effect upon people who have been happy for their children to attend Baha'i children's classes, firstly because Baha'is teach the children of all different faiths, and then as the children learn the parents are drawn to the classes themselves, and from this many decide to become Baha'i.

And why do they become Baha'i for they readily recognize that the Baha'i faith as a wholesome truth, and though some of the followers may be bigoted the faith is not.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 08:52 AM   #15
Senior Member
 
SmilingSkeptic's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2014
From: United States
Posts: 726
Quote:
Originally Posted by BlinkeyBill View Post
Dear Suzanne I also have seen the effect upon people who have been happy for their children to attend Baha'i children's classes, firstly because Baha'is teach the children of all different faiths, and then as the children learn the parents are drawn to the classes themselves, and from this many decide to become Baha'i.

And why do they become Baha'i for they readily recognize that the Baha'i faith as a wholesome truth, and though some of the followers may be bigoted the faith is not.
I personally think that I would have to vet all Baha'i children's classes and other activities before allowing my own children to be sent there, and if my girlfriend wanted to host a children's class if we were married, I would have to go through her curriculum to make sure it's religiously neutral. But I can understand how that works for other people.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 08:52 AM   #16
Senior Member
 
becky's Avatar
 
Joined: Jul 2014
From: colorado/summer-Oklahoma/winter
Posts: 726
You all have such wonderful ideas and knowledge. To be in a commuity where second generation Baha'is are serving, just boggles my mind. With more people, though, comes more opportunity for unresolved differences of opinion. We are just people striving to be better and to better our world. I agree that we should serve where our strengths lie and we are more at ease. We are way more likely to attract those who may be seeking...you are a Baha'i, you will find a way...
 
Old 08-17-2014, 09:04 AM   #17
Senior Member
 
BlinkeyBill's Avatar
 
Joined: Oct 2011
From: Quilimari,Chile
Posts: 4,200
Quote:
Originally Posted by SmilingSkeptic View Post
I personally think that I would have to vet all Baha'i children's classes and other activities before allowing my own children to be sent there, and if my girlfriend wanted to host a children's class if we were married, I would have to go through her curriculum to make sure it's religiously neutral. But I can understand how that works for other people.
How can any religious classes be religiously neutral, I think our friend would Rythmcs would be having a problem here, saying something like a complete impossible statement or other. Big smile
 
Old 08-17-2014, 09:07 AM   #18
Senior Member
 
BlinkeyBill's Avatar
 
Joined: Oct 2011
From: Quilimari,Chile
Posts: 4,200
Quote:
Originally Posted by becky View Post
You all have such wonderful ideas and knowledge. To be in a commuity where second generation Baha'is are serving, just boggles my mind. With more people, though, comes more opportunity for unresolved differences of opinion. We are just people striving to be better and to better our world. I agree that we should serve where our strengths lie and we are more at ease. We are way more likely to attract those who may be seeking...you are a Baha'i, you will find a way...
Yes dear Becky, in your own words " you are a Baha'i, you will find a way..."
 
Old 08-17-2014, 10:14 AM   #19
Senior Member
 
Joined: Mar 2013
From: Netherlands
Posts: 276
Quote:
I personally think that I would have to vet all Baha'i children's classes and other activities before allowing my own children to be sent there, and if my girlfriend wanted to host a children's class if we were married, I would have to go through her curriculum to make sure it's religiously neutral. But I can understand how that works for other people.
Good point. When I lived in the UK all children's class teachers needed to have a police check before they could work with children. Even then, they had to work in pairs. Also, people do discuss with parents what they will be teaching their children -- both in the beginning and in regular home visits. Also, many parents also help out.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 10:48 AM   #20
Senior Member
 
Joined: Mar 2013
From: Netherlands
Posts: 276
Quote:
How can any religious classes be religiously neutral,
Baha'i children's classes from the Ruhi Books focus on teaching virtues. They use quotes from the Writings and Baha'i prayers, but they aren't the sort of classes of religious indoctrination which a lot of people would fear. If they have a different belief system that would be completely respected.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 11:48 AM   #21
Senior Member
 
SmilingSkeptic's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2014
From: United States
Posts: 726
Quote:
Originally Posted by Suzanne9 View Post
Baha'i children's classes from the Ruhi Books focus on teaching virtues. They use quotes from the Writings and Baha'i prayers, but they aren't the sort of classes of religious indoctrination which a lot of people would fear. If they have a different belief system that would be completely respected.
I think the only children's classes that would be acceptable for me to allow my own children to visit would be ones that didn't mention religion or religious writings at all, but simply talked about virtues (and even then, a lot of that stuff could simply be done in public schools without the need for an extra time investment), simply because that would be part of our agreement to allow the children to be affiliated with no religion until they were older, and I have to keep a close watch for that reason.

That isn't to say that I wouldn't allow them to visit Baha'i gatherings, or sit in on firesides, or the like. But even though Catholic schools claim not to indoctrinate children, anything to do with schools or education should only teach what is known to be true by all and so I would draw the line there regardless of which religion was hosting children's educational activities and how neutral they claimed to be. My girlfriend could be free to take the children to a children's class anyway, or set up a Baha'i class I didn't approve of, but that would obviously severely damage our relationship.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 02:55 PM   #22
Senior Member
 
BlinkeyBill's Avatar
 
Joined: Oct 2011
From: Quilimari,Chile
Posts: 4,200
Quote:
Originally Posted by Suzanne9 View Post
Baha'i children's classes from the Ruhi Books focus on teaching virtues. They use quotes from the Writings and Baha'i prayers, but they aren't the sort of classes of religious indoctrination which a lot of people would fear. If they have a different belief system that would be completely respected.
Now of course this I understand and know.

But our friends and his choice of wordage, I was just pointing out how Rythmcs would see what to him is an inconstancy of religious classes being free of religion.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 02:58 PM   #23
Senior Member
 
BlinkeyBill's Avatar
 
Joined: Oct 2011
From: Quilimari,Chile
Posts: 4,200
Quote:
Originally Posted by SmilingSkeptic View Post
I think the only children's classes that would be acceptable for me to allow my own children to visit would be ones that didn't mention religion or religious writings at all, but simply talked about virtues (and even then, a lot of that stuff could simply be done in public schools without the need for an extra time investment), simply because that would be part of our agreement to allow the children to be affiliated with no religion until they were older, and I have to keep a close watch for that reason.

That isn't to say that I wouldn't allow them to visit Baha'i gatherings, or sit in on firesides, or the like. But even though Catholic schools claim not to indoctrinate children, anything to do with schools or education should only teach what is known to be true by all and so I would draw the line there regardless of which religion was hosting children's educational activities and how neutral they claimed to be. My girlfriend could be free to take the children to a children's class anyway, or set up a Baha'i class I didn't approve of, but that would obviously severely damage our relationship.
You I feel are imposing more and more upon your future bride, and is becoming more like control, than a respectful understanding. Just my feel.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 08:44 PM   #24
Senior Member
 
SmilingSkeptic's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2014
From: United States
Posts: 726
Quote:
Originally Posted by BlinkeyBill View Post
You I feel are imposing more and more upon your future bride, and is becoming more like control, than a respectful understanding. Just my feel.
Not only do I think that these are reasonable requirements to make sure that we know everything our hypothetical children are being taught in an effort to truly make their choices free, but she has agreed to this. Besides, I would be fine with them choosing any religion (except for cults like the Jehovah's Witnesses and Scientology), but again I would like for them to be fully informed and for the both of us to know what information they are accessing and how our points of view are being balanced.

Last edited by SmilingSkeptic; 08-17-2014 at 09:07 PM.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 09:05 PM   #25
Senior Member
 
becky's Avatar
 
Joined: Jul 2014
From: colorado/summer-Oklahoma/winter
Posts: 726
Quote:
Originally Posted by aidan View Post
I fear being accused of jealousy which truly is not the case
Rest assured that the breathings of the Holy Spirit will loosen thy tongue. Speak, therefore; speak out with great courage at every meeting. When thou art about to begin thine address, turn first to Baha'u'llah, and ask for the confirmations of the Holy Spirit, then open thy lips and say whatever is suggested to thy heart; this, however, with the utmost courage, dignity and conviction.
'Abdu'l-Baha'
Bless you, Aidan!
 
Old 08-17-2014, 09:13 PM   #26
Just a member
 
Joined: Oct 2013
From: Glenwood, Queensland, Australia
Posts: 628
Good morning SmilingSkeptic

Quote:
Originally Posted by SmilingSkeptic View Post
Not only do I think that these are reasonable requirements to make sure that we know everything our hypothetical children are being taught in an effort to truly make their choices free, but she has agreed to this. Besides, I would be fine with them choosing any religion (except for cults like the Jehovah's Witnesses and Scientology.)
Your "hypothetical children" have the right, the same as yourself, the same as your girlfriend, to choose their own minds, their own way forward. By teaching your children the process of logic and reason, and by your wife teaching the same, but with the Faith included, you can both form a foundation where the children, as they grow, as they mature, as they develop into greater responsibility over time, have excellent minds, minds which are not stained by prejudice, imitation and superstition. Achieveing these three will require both of you, for then if they choose religion, it will be with none of the superstition and mis-guidance that we see so prevalent in the world today, and if they choose your path, then they will, have made that choice for themselves.

As a result of both your efforts, your children can become upstanding and contributing members of society who have greater potential to the strengths of leadership than to the weakness of followers based on peer pressure.

I don't know if you like Kahlil Gibran or not, but these words from his book "The Prophet", make much sense:

Quote:
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you, but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backwards nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer see the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the Archers hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.
With my warmest of greetings

Romane
 
Old 08-17-2014, 09:31 PM   #27
Senior Member
 
SmilingSkeptic's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2014
From: United States
Posts: 726
In what way, Romane, did I say that this would not be the case? All I am saying is that I would take a close look at both any curriculum for a class my girlfriend would teach, and at those taught by others. What parent would not do that? I wouldn't send my kids to any public or private school without thoroughly reviewing them either.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 09:45 PM   #28
Just a member
 
Joined: Oct 2013
From: Glenwood, Queensland, Australia
Posts: 628
Quote:
Originally Posted by SmilingSkeptic View Post
In what way, Romane, did I say that this would not be the case? All I am saying is that I would take a close look at both any curriculum for a class my girlfriend would teach, and at those taught by others. What parent would not do that? I wouldn't send my kids to any public or private school without thoroughly reviewing them either.
(Romane bows again)
 
Old 08-17-2014, 09:50 PM   #29
Senior Member
 
SmilingSkeptic's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2014
From: United States
Posts: 726
I actually have come across Khalil Gibran's poetry every so often and like it a lot, and whenever I walk through DC I always make sure to stop off at his memorial.

 
Old 08-17-2014, 10:14 PM   #30
Senior Member
 
Joined: Mar 2013
From: Netherlands
Posts: 276
SmilingSkeptic wrote:

Quote:
My girlfriend could be free to take the children to a children's class anyway, or set up a Baha'i class I didn't approve of, but that would obviously severely damage our relationship.
Does she know this? This is the sort of thing that people need to discuss before committing to have children and raise them together. It can make for a lot of friction in the family.

My husband is an atheist, and a really, really strong one. I wasn't a Baha'i when we married, but became a Baha'i five years later. He felt really hard done by when I started to believe in God, and he didn't want me to "indoctrinate" our children in my beliefs. I told him that I couldn't not teach my children my beliefs. It was who I am. But he should feel free to share with them his beliefs (or non-beliefs) too.

Long story short, the kids did go to Nineteen-Day Feasts, summer schools and children's classes, and they turned out to be really nice people who never criticised him for his lack of belief, or for drinking alcohol or anything else. Although they did declare as Baha'is when they were 15, they are as close to him as they are to me, and they share a great many of his interests. None of the feared negative results of "religious indoctrination" ever happened.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 10:17 PM   #31
Just a member
 
Joined: Oct 2013
From: Glenwood, Queensland, Australia
Posts: 628
Good morning SmilingSkeptic

Quote:
Originally Posted by SmilingSkeptic View Post
I actually have come across Khalil Gibran's poetry every so often and like it a lot, and whenever I walk through DC I always make sure to stop off at his memorial.
My deep appreciation for the information and the photo. Had not know that such a memorial existed.

Bit far for me to get there and if I follow the directions of Google I need to have about three canoes lined up to get there True - ask it to give you directions from, say, Cairns in Queensland, Australia, to one of the cities on the western coast of America. Always good for a chuckle.

With my warmest greetings

Romane
 
Old 08-17-2014, 10:18 PM   #32
Senior Member
 
Joined: Mar 2013
From: Netherlands
Posts: 276
SmilingSkeptic wrote:

Quote:
I actually have come across Khalil Gibran's poetry every so often and like it a lot, and whenever I walk through DC I always make sure to stop off at his memorial.
I love the memorial to Kahlil Gibran you showed. I'm sure you did know that he knew and loved 'Abdu'l-Baha.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 10:22 PM   #33
Senior Member
 
SmilingSkeptic's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2014
From: United States
Posts: 726
Quote:
Originally Posted by Suzanne9 View Post
Does she know this? This is the sort of thing that people need to discuss before committing to have children and raise them together. It can make for a lot of friction in the family.

My husband is an atheist, and a really, really strong one. I wasn't a Baha'i when we married, but became a Baha'i five years later. He felt really hard done by when I started to believe in God, and he didn't want me to "indoctrinate" our children in my beliefs. I told him that I couldn't not teach my children my beliefs. It was who I am. But he should feel free to share with them his beliefs (or non-beliefs) too.

Long story short, the kids did go to Nineteen-Day Feasts, summer schools and children's classes, and they turned out to be really nice people who never criticised him for his lack of belief, or for drinking alcohol or anything else. Although they did declare as Baha'is when they were 15, they are as close to him as they are to me, and they share a great many of his interests. None of the feared negative results of "religious indoctrination" ever happened.
I have made this clear to her, and she knows why a.) any classes she teaches and b.) any classes others teach need to be approved by me and feels my position is reasonable based on the information I currently have. She says that hopefully I can see a children's class with her at some point so we can both have a further understanding, and I agree, but will probably not change my mind and keep the ability to veto any activities I feel uncomfortable with, as well as remain free to share my criticisms of the Baha'i Faith with our children. She also knows that I would keep wine or beer but only drink it if say a friend came over and the kids were away, so again the idea is that I have my own position while simultaneously trying to be respectful of hers.

Last edited by SmilingSkeptic; 08-17-2014 at 10:26 PM.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 10:25 PM   #34
Senior Member
 
SmilingSkeptic's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2014
From: United States
Posts: 726
Quote:
Originally Posted by Suzanne9 View Post
I love the memorial to Kahlil Gibran you showed. I'm sure you did know that he knew and loved 'Abdu'l-Baha.
I didn't know that, and in fact did not know about Kahlil Gibran until I passed by his memorial and made a daily habit of reflecting for a bit there. It's very beautiful, with a fountain in the center, a small garden, and stone benches with his poetry on it. Perhaps my girlfriend or her parents may know about that and about him, and have a book of his poetry on hand so I can see for myself.

And Romane, I think you may get a kick out of this:


Last edited by SmilingSkeptic; 08-17-2014 at 10:27 PM.
 
Old 08-17-2014, 10:29 PM   #35
Just a member
 
Joined: Oct 2013
From: Glenwood, Queensland, Australia
Posts: 628
Very dear friend

Quote:
Originally Posted by SmilingSkeptic View Post
... but will probably not change my mind and keep the ability to veto any activities I feel uncomfortable with, as well as remain free to criticize the Baha'i Faith. She also knows that I would keep wine or beer but only drink it if say a friend came over, so again the idea is that I have my own position while simultaneously trying to be respectful of hers.
I will give you my honest opinion, but will not enter into discussion about it. This will be my last effort to give you encouragement in this area, for you have already said that no-one elses view is as good as your own. That which does not bend, breaks.

Such a position may be fine now, but at some point down the track? Already, while she prepares for success, you set up for failure.

I, not we.

With my warmest greetings

Romane
 
Old 08-17-2014, 10:35 PM   #36
Just a member
 
Joined: Oct 2013
From: Glenwood, Queensland, Australia
Posts: 628
Good morning Smiling Skeptic

Quote:
Originally Posted by SmilingSkeptic View Post
And Romane, I think you may get a kick out of this:
Please wait while I pick myself up off the floor, amd laughing that hard.

swim

Someone at Google as a sense of humour



With warm greetings

Romane
 
Old 08-17-2014, 10:38 PM   #37
Senior Member
 
SmilingSkeptic's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2014
From: United States
Posts: 726
Quote:
Originally Posted by Romane View Post
Very dear friend



I will give you my honest opinion, but will not enter into discussion about it. This will be my last effort to give you encouragement in this area, for you have already said that no-one elses view is as good as your own. That which does not bend, breaks.

Such a position may be fine now, but at some point down the track? Already, while she prepares for success, you set up for failure.

I, not we.

With my warmest greetings

Romane
A couple can certainly have different positions on certain things- and this is one of them. I think that I should absolutely have the right to speak up about activities I find even the slightest bit uncomfortable, and I hope that we would only send our children to anything after agreeing on it together. What could you possibly ask me to do? Abdicate my responsibility towards my own children in that regard, and remain a fly on the wall?
 
Old 08-17-2014, 10:43 PM   #38
Senior Member
 
SmilingSkeptic's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2014
From: United States
Posts: 726
Quote:
Originally Posted by Romane View Post
Good morning Smiling Skeptic



Please wait while I pick myself up off the floor, amd laughing that hard.

swim

Someone at Google as a sense of humour



With warm greetings

Romane
Hey, it would save a fortune of airfare.

Also, this guy apparently managed to make the journey without a kickboard and it took him 73 days.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beno%C3%AEt_Lecomte

Last edited by SmilingSkeptic; 08-17-2014 at 10:46 PM.
 
Old 08-18-2014, 09:10 AM   #39
Senior Member
 
BlinkeyBill's Avatar
 
Joined: Oct 2011
From: Quilimari,Chile
Posts: 4,200
Quote:
Originally Posted by SmilingSkeptic View Post
Not only do I think that these are reasonable requirements to make sure that we know everything our hypothetical children are being taught in an effort to truly make their choices free, but she has agreed to this. Besides, I would be fine with them choosing any religion (except for cults like the Jehovah's Witnesses and Scientology), but again I would like for them to be fully informed and for the both of us to know what information they are accessing and how our points of view are being balanced.
Dear friend I agree, I just made an observation, from some of your posts. I would feel that you do not wish to be perceived as a controlling person, you have made some observations concerning other parents in your past posts, I just felt the need to warn that maybe you were becoming the very thing you said you disliked.

Just something to be aware and careful of.
 
Old 08-18-2014, 12:58 PM   #40
Senior Member
 
Joined: Jul 2011
From: n ireland
Posts: 1,747
Quote:
Originally Posted by SmilingSkeptic View Post
A couple can certainly have different positions on certain things- and this is one of them. I think that I should absolutely have the right to speak up about activities I find even the slightest bit uncomfortable, and I hope that we would only send our children to anything after agreeing on it together. What could you possibly ask me to do? Abdicate my responsibility towards my own children in that regard, and remain a fly on the wall?
You really are determined to be assertive with her. Do you not know and trust her enough to accept that she would only do something good?
 
Reply

  Baha'i Forums > Baha'i Forums > Baha'i Administration

Tags
nepotism



Thread Tools
Display Modes



Facebook @bahaiforums RSS


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
SEO by vBSEO 3.6.0 ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.
Copyright © 2006 - 2017 Bahai Forums. All rights reserved.