MissySepi

Allah'u'abha Friends

I am a Persian Baha'i and about to get married in few months.
The Reason I have joined this forum is because I have few questions about the Bahai Marriage, since I am getting married to a Baha'i as well. I know that we must obtain both parents consents to become engaged and the waiting period is from the time that the consent of all parents is obtained to the time of marriage ceremony should not exceed 95 days (Persian Believers).


I am not engaged yet, but one of the parents gave consent early due to family problem, now the rest of the family wants us to get done with compulsory part of the ceremony to sign the marriage certificate (before the other parent who gave the consent, change mind) which suppose to be done on the day of the ceremony or before? and then have the wedding later on.

Can anyone please tell me the right steps of Baha'i (Persian) marriage?
this is really important, I tried the bahai books and websites but couldnt find enough information.:mellow

Thank you.
MissySepi

arthra

Messy Sepi..

Welcome!

The first thing that occurred to me is that you need to be in consultation with your Local Spiritual Assembly and addressing your issues to that body as they have "jurisdiction" and can consult with you and make decisions ..

May the blessings of Abha always be with you!:wink

MissySepi

Thank you for your reply Arthra, appreciate it.

The thing is that, Local Spirtual Assembly is aware of that parent's behaviour, since that parent kept changing mind for no reason really before for their other child, now in my case, the family wants us to get done with it before that parent change mind and cause drama.

I just wanted to know is it possible to do the compulsory part now (which means I have to move in with my partner as they are concern?) and I am not ready yet to get married just now or withing next month, and that came to the shock why I am not ready?

They cant force ... can they?

arthra

No one can "force" you to do anything but it seems to me the Assembly is the body that holds the key to the issue.. If you consult with them and they advise you then that's for you to take to your heart..

Susanne Alexander

Hi! It seems like some of your anxiety stems from wondering whether you are ready to marry. I'm posting to make sure that you are aware of the marriage preparation resources that our Marriage Transformation Project has developed for Baha'is. I note that you are in New Zealand, but the main book Marriage Can Be Forever--Preparation Counts! is available as a pdf download file, so there is no shipping cost involved. The UHJ has encouraged Baha'is: "Careful preparation for marriage is an essential first step in the preservation of Baha'i marriage."

I agree that the Assembly is the best place to go for consultation on the issues as well. Your potential fiancee of course needs to be fully involved.

Here's the link to look at the resources:

Marriage Transformation Store Catalog Books EBooks Worksheets Gifts Coaching Magnets

I'm working on a site just for Baha'is, but it will take me a few months.

Loving greetings,
Susanne Alexander, Relationship/Marriage Coach
USA

Lonestranger

Marry ... thats all I can say ... get married ... and then story shall begin ...

jenesabby

Many feel that marriage has slowly eroded over the years when compared to the relatively low divorce rates of previous decades. However, it should be noted that in those days couples stayed together no matter what, most often for the children because divorce was frowned upon. However, these days things are much more open and divorce is used more often now as a means to split up two people who can no longer spend time together. Whether it is because couples both have busy and stressful lives that slowly cause them to drift apart, or if there are other reasons for the marriage difficulty, the professionals are there to provide help to both parties.

civaAccix

Продавец - эта такая универсальная профессия для дамочек не обремененных высшим образованием. И остается больше денег для покупки другой одежды. Знает как ничего ни делать и зарабатывать. Ножки словно новенькие становятся, через пол часика можно снова на шпильки Хороший лак, покупала через подругу которая в салоне работает.

BruceDLimber

Couldn't have said it better myself, Civa! :-S

Bruce

cire perdue

even though LSA members are aware of the situtaion, that is not the same as an Assembly decision or action. The LSA needs to be consulted. However it appears you need time to decide things for yourself. This is a big step, and I think you are starting to grasp that and think about it. I think that is the most important thing you can do. However an LSA must approve the marriage requirements such as parental consent etc. You cannot be forced. It is okay to take time to consider this as you seem to be doing. Good for you!!

Essence of GOD

the ones who keep changing their mind, do you really think its a good idea to have them decide your lifes path.
if you like the one your getting marred to, and he/she likes you back, then doit.
religion should not be a case of grief. just my two cents

mathewjackson

Marriage is one of the oldest socially recognized institution and essential for the procreation of children and satisfaction of our sexual urges. In different societies there are different methods of marriage. Some of the societies allow a male to marry only a single female whereas in other societies a husband is allowed to have more than one wife. Similarly some societies will not allow a woman to have more than one husband whereas other societies will not mind a woman having more than one husband. In some cases the parent arranges the marriage whereas in others the boys and girls arrange their marriage.personalized wedding favors